Around this time year ago, I heard the news on my way home from my parent's place. It's been going around as rumours but deep inside I always thought people exaggerated a bit about everything. I got a sms msg from Daloo3ah that said “I heard Baba Zayed died. Do you know anything about it?”. I felt my heart stop and I started flipping the channels on the radio. It was reading Quran every where. My bro WF was driving and I could even say the words. I murmured Sheikh Zayed and burst into tears. All the way over I was in this silent mood. My bro couldn’t even talk. I saw his eyes tear but he was trying to hold himself together. I was getting all these calls from my family and friends trying to check on me. They all knew how attached I was to him- since I was a little girl. I couldn’t answer anyone. I just wanted to be alone.
I got home and turned the TV on. I still couldn’t believe it. I was in a state of total denial. I held on to a cushion and hysterically cried in silence. I never cry except alone. My husband walked in and was shocked to see me- I looked away. He never saw me cry like that. It was like dying is allowed to everyone else but not him. My cousins came over and stayed to calm me down. There was nothing anyone could do to make me feel better. I needed to grieve. I needed to cry my heart out. I wanted him back.
Family and friends made it easier for me to get through it. I received the incredible healing power of love. I needed love and understanding the most.
I remember all the little talks I had the privilege to share with him. I know I was one of the lucky ones to actually meet him many times. Words can’t express how great of a man he was. He was a leader, a role model, and a father.
A person with great insight. A generous giver. A person very rare! A true legacy.

I miss him dearly- somehow tears come easily now as they did then.

I know a lot of us felt that way.
He had a special place in our hearts and now that space is left void.
Please pray for him. May his soul rest in peace. May he rest in a better place. Closer to God. Pray for his sons- I trust they will continue everything he started and will do a great job.

Needless to say that we all have a job to keep his legacy alive.

How?

By doing the best we can with our lives. If you are still in school then study harder. Remember, this wouldn’t have been possible without him. If you are working, then perfect your job. It’s with his intangible support that you got to where you are today. If you are a stay at home mother- the greatest job of all, then raise your children to all the values that he’s taught us. Teach them to love this country with all their hearts.
Keep reminding yourself how lucky we are to live in this great country. No one else in the world has been this fortunate. This country has given us so much. Payback is long due.

[24] diamonds (286 opened the sack)  [+] Jewel Link

I've been tagged again by the one and only Al.. Yay!

Last book you read: Down came the rain
Last phone number you called: The CEO
Last show you watched on TV: Desperate Housewives
Last thing you had to drink: Water
Last thing you ate: Grilled cheese sandwich
Last time you cried: 6 weeks ago. Ahmed was crying and I didn’t know what to do. I just sat next to him and started crying too. He looked at me in that state and stopped crying.
Last time you smiled: a few seconds ago.
Last person you hugged: Ahmed
Last person you talked to on the phone: Kitty
Last thing you smelled: Ahmed’s Diapers. Just checking if he pooped or not.
Last CD that you bought: Baby Einstein Lullaby Classics
Last song you sang: Hush little Ahmed don’t say a word.. Mommy is going buy you a mocking bird
Last thing you laughed at: Daloo3ah- she is taking driving lessons and was actually teaching me the rules of the road.
What's in your cd player/changer: Quran – Anasheed
What time did you wake up today: 3:00
Current favorite article of clothing: Pajamas
Favorite place to be: My parent’s place
Least favorite place: Marina Mall
Believe in an afterlife? Yes
In Heaven or Hell: in Heaven Inshalla
How tall are you: 162 cm
Current favorite word: ya salam! OR la wallah!
Favorite Book: The Rule of Four
Random lyric: Just dropped in (to check what condition my condition was in) by Kenny Rogers. It keeps playing on TV for the Kuwait MTC Vodaphone Ad.
If I could be doing anything right now, i would be: bungee jumping- haven’t done it in 2 years.
Are you a daredevil? Not any more.
Have you ever told a secret you swore you'd never tell? Once- but in my defense it was to help the person who told me the secret.
Do looks matter? No. Unless your lining for a model contest. To me beauty is from within.
How do you release your anger? Cry. Pathetic I know.
My second home is: My TV room/ My car
One thing i have that i wish i didn't is: The ability to trust easily
All you need is: unconditional love
Something I want but I don't really need is: This
Something I need but I don't really want is: A new wardrobe- I don't want to shop till I lose all the weight and if I find something irrisesistable I would buy a smaller size as a motivation to lose weight.

*Do you...*

Drink? Yes! But of course you meant Drink DRINK.. well no.. no alcohol in my system
Have a Boyfriend/girlfriend? LoL.. yes.. fedait my hubby
Have a dream that keeps coming back? a bad nightmare actually.. don’t want to talk about it..
Believe there is life on other planets? Yes
Read the newspaper? Sometimes
Consider yourself tolerant of others? Sometimes.. I just can’t handle stupidity that well..
Consider police a friend or foe? A friend as long as they don’t fine me for the 100% tint on my car

Okay now after learning a bit about me.. I tag.. hmm.. I tag.. adaydreamer, AWG, Alexiel, Amaamy, bedweyah, bent AD, Breathtaking, Damirage, De Rosa, Devilish Girl, Dragon, Dubai's Girl, Melody, Kamoola, Kitten, libellula, DxB Rose, el-79, lulu, Miwacle, mn~Dubai, Nagmat UAE, Natasha Pearly, Pink Gurl, Pink Sushiiiiii, Rosy, eNory, Surrlealist, Tortured Lady, Adorie-only if you have time! of course I'll be visiting your site to check your answers.. they're fun..

and now back to the nanny hunt from last update.. since the votes were very close between Lanie and Ofelia.. I though of posting their pics.. =)

they look scary I know.. it's a fax image

and regarding the religion.. well I looked for muslims in all the agencies I was calling and for some reason they stopped hiring them. I called 8 agencies in Abu Dhabi. I actually wanted an Indian cuz I already have a philippina maid at home but in vein. So if you do know of any agencies please email me on uaeyah@uaeyah.com.. but for the time being I will go ahead with one of these two candidates.
The nanny won't be alone with the baby during the day. I will be dropping them both over at my aunts place who will be watching them. I need to go back to work. They've been calling me like crazy and my team is going nuts with my deputy who's giving them hard time. I wish I could stay with Ahmed but I do need to work. I worked so hard to get to where I am today- I don't want to lose 5 years of hardwork and sweat. Hopefully I will be able to manage both but if I felt that I was by any way doing Ahmed injustice then I will resign for sure. He is more important to me than any job in the world.

Thank you guys for all the help.. very much appreciated.. *hugs*

[11] diamonds (190 opened the sack)  [+] Jewel Link

I stood in front of the mirror and glanced at my reflection- I smiled thinking Oh God I am a mother! Feeling ditz that early in the morning, I carried Ahmed in my arms and stood in front of the mirror again talking to him. He was fascinated by his own reflection. He started gurgling, cooing, and making all kinds of sweet sounds. This went on for an hour at least and when we both got tired of the mirror I said goodbye mirror- and for a second there I didn’t recognize me. I look different.
My face looks fuller, my shape is totally different and just then I thought is that really me? so just after that question mark in my head my quest for losing weight had begun. I didn’t do it earlier because I wanted to make sure I didn’t compromise my milk supply. But now since its steady I think there’ll be no harm.
I put Ahmed to sleep and headed to the cross trainer. I worked out for half and hour and Oh how painful that was. I haven’t worked out in more than 9 months! Except for the occasional walks I used to take.
I called up the dietitian that I used to visit before pregnancy and she was delighted to hear my voice. She pulled out my file and surprisingly wasn’t shocked at the changes I went through with my body. She said “I am a mother too. I know how you feel. It’s okay. We can do it.”
After 20 mins of talking and discussing my regimen we came up with a daily plan that works with my fasting. It’s fairly simple and easy. It’s the same diet i am used to home but she added the fact that I needed to drink more water. I eat very healthy and I have been for awhile now. Pregnancy and having a child can really change you. It certainly have for me. The day I found out about my pregnancy I was even more strict about my eating habits. I cut down on my caffeine intake. Had more green and was religious about taking my supplementary vitamins and proud to say that I am still on that same plan.
So the whole idea is to try and drink more water. I am not so into water. I would have one liter the most and the rest would be fruit juices which are very high in calories. I am so into dairy products. I love cheese and yoghurt! I can’t help it. so those have to be cut down now too.
My next visit to the dietitian is on Wednesday. We’ll see how much I lose by then. I feel like Bridget Jones! =)

Anyho… My nanny hunt is now very serious and I need to get over with it before Eid. Here are the candidates:
• Soledad (Christian, 48yr, 0 kids, Experience 85-00 in Hong Kong)
• Christina (Christian, 43yr, 3 kids, Experience 00-02 in Bahrain)
• Emileta (Christian, 48yr, 2 kids, Experience 00-02 in Brunei)
• Melba (Christian, 39yr, 4 kids, Experience 86-87 in Taiwan)
• Lanie (Christian, 36yr, 3 kids, First Timer)
• Ofelia (Christian, 35yr, 2 kids, Experience 99-2004 in Kuwait + Jordan)
• Myrna (Christian, 37yr, 3 kids, Experience 98-01 in Taiwan)

So if you haven’t voted please do so- I need your help in deciding who to get (the poll is on the right side). I am resuming work after Eid. ;(

Candy: it was great bumping into you in Bur Juman. You looked amazing!
UAE02: Thank you for the phone call. It’s been 5 long years since I last heard your voice. Dusty!

A last shout out to whoever invented the pacifier. May God bless you.

to Dragon. i took this pic for you! =) Ahmed in his Ferrari suit

[38] diamonds (290 opened the sack)  [+] Jewel Link

Wishing you and your loved ones a blessed month filled with happiness and faith.
I love you all and missing you so so so much. I will be back soon. I am still working out my timings with Ahmed.
I haven't touched this laptop in ages. I'm even typing slower than usual >_<".
My inbox is filled with emails that I need to check and reply- so if you sent me something then I will reply for sure- all in good time though =)
Till my next update- take care.

[34] diamonds (258 opened the sack)  [+] Jewel Link